Everyone has a certain amount of fear of being rejected whether they’re men or women. Men seem to become nearly paralyzed with fear, though, when it comes to approaching women. There’s a very simple reason for this. We are after something that we know they most likely won’t want to give to us. The minute we start talking to them it feels like we’re wearing a big sign that tells them what we want. That’s because we are.
Women are designed to relate. They relate to women, children, furniture, clothes, you name it, they relate to it. It’s how they interpret the world. If they can’t relate to it then it’s not real or it’s a threat. Women love to relate to men but men (to them) don’t love to return the favor. A woman is like a mirror. She shares herself with someone and she expects that sharing to be reflected in another mirror. If you’ve ever looked into two mirrors you know the repeat images can go on infinitely. This is how relationships work with them.
There’s no way we men can keep up with this constant reflection of emotion and we know it. We don’t want to relate. We just want what we want. When we begin a conversation with a woman she’s looking right through us and can almost always see (or sense) what we’re after.
So how do you overcome this? Change what you’re after. Instead of looking down the road to the date look at the moment in which you find yourself. Enjoy this moment for what it offers. If you don’t have an expectation it can’t be sensed. Allow the expectation to appear in it’s appropriate time frame. Simply enjoy the current conversation and relax. She’ll sense the relaxed ‘feeling’ you’re projecting and she’ll ‘reflect’ that same relaxation.
They say when the student is ready the teacher will appear. In the same way when the woman is ready the expected rewards will appear.